Weekend Stuff

I took a few days off training for various reasons. Tonight though I’m off to OJJ.

Yesterday I went into the city with the missus and checked out my favourite overpriced Reversal stockist, and lo and behold the famous “Who says the striker can’t grappling?” t-shirt was there!

With Reversal t-shirts costing as much as a small island nation, I could simply stand and stare with my tongue hanging out. The shopkeeper saw my tattered jeans and non-gold-plated head and promptly shooed me out of the shop, but not before I had a chance to snap this baby:

My BJJFJ membership card came through, ysss! *fist pumps air* Ysss! That means I can now… um… well, it means fuck all except I’m 2000 yen poorer and I now have the priviledge of paying to enter lots of competitions. Woo.

Last but not least, some Lego models of World Heritage sites, on display at a shopping centre. Fascinatingz!

One more thing… anyone who has cauliflower ear out there… how long does it hurt for? Mine has been tender for about a week, and even though I took about four days off training, it’s still hot and hurts like buggery. It doesn’t help that a three year old punched me in the ear the other day, but still…

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How to turn a ratty old pair of kung fu pants into fight shorts!

I might have a top-secret project coming up for Fighters Only magazine, and for it, I need my Shooto gear. I splashed out a while ago and bought some gloves, some grappling shorts, and a groin guard. So I went into my closet to dust off my nut-box, and couldn’t find my shorts anywhere. Fucking shit burgers. I think I left them in England. So, seeing as I’m skint, I decided to chop up an old pair of ratty kung fu pants and turn them into totarly awesum grapplinge shorts!1!?

I wanted to use my old gi-pants, from the first gi I ever got. But I tried them on and I looked like MC Hammer, those mother fuckers were big! Jeez I must have been fat before. So anyway, luckily I found some old kung fu trousers and used them.

Here’s a step-by-step guide, so you can do the same. Warning: I spent about four fucking hours hunched over a sewing machine and it was totally not worth it, but check it out anyway, assholes!

Step 1: Get ratty old kung fu pants out.

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Step 2: Get totally freakin’ sweet reversal patch ready. Fold the edges over and iron flat.

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Step 3: Fold the shorts to the length you want. I originally was just going to cut them off, but I thought the material was too thin, so decided to split them, and fold the bottom half up inside the top half, kind of like when a man undergoes a sex change and they cut his cock open lengthways and push it up and… oh god this is disgusting. Kind of like they did to Babs in League of Gentlemen, anyway. Check the size and pin it in place!

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Step 4: Cut the pants all the way up to the knee (or the point where you want them to end on your leg). Fold over the seams and sew them to stop them splitting. At this point they look like some kind of ultra-funky, Bruce Lee inspired flares. Or they just look like trousers that have been cut open, either way.

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Step 5: Stitch a whole bunch of stuff. This part is not fun.

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Step 6: This is the base of the pants, now folded up inside and sewed (badly) near the waistband.

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Step 7: Break and eat some seriously tasty oven grilled chicken. That’s what I did, anyway.

Step 8: Prepare the sheer beauty that is a crisp new Reversal patch. Drooooool. On a serious note, in an arty, crafty, totally unconscious level, there is something I love about the texture, solid construction, and clean colours of Reversal patches. Sewing them on yourself is surprisingly satisfying.

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Step 9: Sew that motherfucker on and basically you are done!

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Step 10: Get some fucking leg muscles, Jesus you skinny fuck.

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Making my own shorts was an interesting and painful experience I will probably never, ever repeat, and although the shorts will probably fall apart as soon as anyone touches them, they will forever hold a special place in my chest cavity.

Shopping and stuff

Had a good day today. Went to the city, went to the doctors to get the fucking lowdown on why the hell I keep catching colds. So he’s doing some tests to check for allergies and stuff.

The rest of the day we walked around the city. I checked in at Isami, the wicked martial arts shop. There are branches all over Japan, and they are the brand behind Reversal, the coolest MMA clothing makers ever.

Going into Isami is dangerous for me, so I try to limit my visits. It is an absolute treasure trove of awesome stuff. Luckily, I only spent 1500 yen today. I bought Gracie Magazine… first time I had seen it in there, and seeing how starved I am of paper-material to read, I figured I’d splash out. It’s a little out of date, seeing as it’s imported, but I will still get some good hours out of it.

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I also bought a Reversal patch, for my top secret project, which shall be revealed in the next post.

I picked up a catalogue for Reversal, and the bastards have stolen my idea of having a gi on a t-shirt… shitting fuck-cocks, I knew I should have been quicker. There’s also some amusing Janglish, as per usual… WHO SAYS THE STRIKER CAN’T GRAPPLING ? Damn good question, I say.

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Got my black belt!

Ooops, minor typo. Got a black belt.

Had my camera handy so wanted to show off this wicked black belt from Reversal, the single coolest MMA / BJJ clothing manufacturer ever, in my humble opinion.

When I’m feeling particularly geeky I’ll show off my reversal t-shirt collection.

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Where to put my patches?

I have got a couple of patches for my new gi, and I plan on buying a new academy patch for my other gi. But where to put them? I found this image on the International Brazilian Jiu Jitsu federation home page, I hope it is accurate. I’ve heard rumours that patches on the legs are just a big no-no. Maybe it’s my crappy Japanese? Anyone got the scoop?

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